How do I relieve sexual tension in a non sinful way? The Bible talks about self discipline and training your mind not to look lustfully at young Women. And the last thing I want to do is sin against god. I really need help with this and I don't know how to go about it.
Hi anonymous person. Prayer and outside of prayer I would suggest control the eyes, and the ears, sometimes music can take control of your mood swings, monitor what makes you weak, spend a lot of time in the word, and do whatever you can to minister what the Holyspirit have taught you through the scripture, change may not come overnight , but know that you made your partition before the Lord. I hope that helps.
That's a very important & pertinent issue you've raised & I appreciate your honesty in admitting it, an area so common to the male species, but often kept buried. With all the bombardment from the media that typifies women as sexual objects rather than seeing them as God intended & to love & respect them as we would our own mothers & sisters, it is little wonder that both Christians & non-Christians suffer badly here.
I understand what you're saying, though unsure of your marital status or age group, as in my younger days as a single unbeliever in the Armed Forces, there was always the pressure to conform & to view females in an unnatural way; & our treatment of them usually reflected our mindset. Many of them too, gave in to us & one even openly stated that women were on Earth to give pleasure to men! So for the Christian, Jesus' Work at the Cross not only forgives us our past sins but endues us with Power from on high to live above that type of carnal living. Yet the internal struggle goes on.
You write about "self discipline and training your mind" which I presume includes spending much time in God's Word & prayer & specifically about your areas of weakness. Indeed, the Spirit of the Lord is there to guide & strengthen you, but also to inspire you to use whatever means to deal with it. Remember, whenever we seek to remove something from within, there is an empty space to fill. If it remains empty, then that temptation to sin is ever ready to fill the void. And this goes for any sin which is not of a sexual nature. You know the things that trigger lust for you & so how can you avoid them or deal with them? As said, soak yourself in the Word & serving the Lord in whatever way you can. Look at women as those of your own family. Whenever the wrong thoughts enter, cover it with the Word, look to the Lord to give you a way of escape ( 1 Corinthians 10:13), fill your mind with goodness ( Philippians 4:8). "An idle mind is the Devil's Workshop" - keep your mind employed.
I am also only 16 and my family kind of does nothing all the time. How can I stay busy and keep bad thoughts out of my head when I do nothing all the time, it's a huge void for satan to fill, and I read the Bible but I can't read it all day everyday. I take time out to read the Bible daily, but What do I do to take up some of my free time afterwards.
Your honesty & strong desire for victory in this weak area of your life, is noticeable & you do receive our prayers & support. As a young man of 16, I perceive that your unnatural view of women, has been introduced & fostered by engaging in media depictions of women or even through viewing pornography. I know many people, young & old, engage in this as it is given so liberally on the Web & elsewhere, to satisfy our sinful cravings.
You say that the "void" in your life is huge & that is so dangerous. I can't change your family's use of their spare time, but I can offer some suggestions. And I agree, that Bible reading & prayer cannot take up all your time, even for the ability to concentrate. But remember, prayer to God for help, is not confined at a particular time of the day, but wherever you might be: on the street, in a cafe, out with friends. Whenever sin comes knocking at the door of your heart, your first call is to the Lord Who loves you & wants to see you living in victory.
An addiction, any addiction, requires determination & discipline to rid the habit. The craving might be there for a while, but the pursuit of it has to stop quickly. Firstly, stay away from those areas that are tempting you to lust. Remember that the Bible often speaks of fleeing lust when it comes ( 2 Timothy 2:22, James 4:7, 1 Corinthians 10:13,14, 1 Timothy 6:9-12, 1 Corinthians 6:18-20). If it's books, the Web, the beach, the movies, etc. that is causing you to falter, then stay away from them. The next important thing is how you view women. Always make it a constant practise to see them in a proper, natural way as equal members of society, worthy of real love & respect. You're in that 'highly charged' age group, but that doesn't mean that women should be considered in any other way than you would expect them to consider you or treat you. Be involved in Church youth socializing with them, be careful who your friends are & where you go with them. What are your interests?
So whether it's Art that is your hobby (& that is a great past-time requiring the creative part of your brain) & it takes up some of your spare time, or something else, such as reading, engaging in constructive games with family, friends, or on the Web, all these & many more that we can do to keep ourselves occupied & not let our minds begin to wander. Even helping a friend or neighbour out, can be very satisfying.
When the mind wanders, it sometimes settles on thoughts that are not right or pleasing to the Lord. As you train yourself to focus on other worthy things in life & keep yourself busy, you'll find that your attitude & perceptions of others will also change. When once you looked at women with lust, you will now consider them differently in a godly way, & not as objects bringing on wrong thoughts. And when the time comes for you to settle down in marriage, as you ask the Lord for the right person to be your wife, you will see her & appreciate her for who she is & her contribution to your life & not just for sexual satisfaction. And she will appreciate a husband who has kept himself pure in mind & body, trusting the Lord for everything. You have a great life in Christ ahead of you - continue to seek Him first in everything you face & all your needs will be met, as a loving Father giving care to His son.
I'm retired now & don't get about as much as I used to. However, this gives me opportunity to read more of God's Word (as you are also doing), ministering to others & getting on this KJB Site to be part of a great bunch of believers seeking to help others get to know the Lord & His Word better. Otherwise, odd jobs around the house, gardening & my love for flying (on a computer Simulator of course), also keeps me mentally & spiritually engaged. I too falter & fail the Lord at times - but the Lord's response is never one of anger & rejection, but of love, forgiveness & restoration. Stay close to Him at all times, my young friend - He's always there for you.
I understand what you're saying, though unsure of your marital status or age group, as in my younger days as a single unbeliever in the Armed Forces, there was always the pressure to conform & to view females in an unnatural way; & our treatment of them usually reflected our mindset. Many of them too, gave in to us & one even openly stated that women were on Earth to give pleasure to men! So for the Christian, Jesus' Work at the Cross not only forgives us our past sins but endues us with Power from on high to live above that type of carnal living. Yet the internal struggle goes on.
You write about "self discipline and training your mind" which I presume includes spending much time in God's Word & prayer & specifically about your areas of weakness. Indeed, the Spirit of the Lord is there to guide & strengthen you, but also to inspire you to use whatever means to deal with it. Remember, whenever we seek to remove something from within, there is an empty space to fill. If it remains empty, then that temptation to sin is ever ready to fill the void. And this goes for any sin which is not of a sexual nature. You know the things that trigger lust for you & so how can you avoid them or deal with them? As said, soak yourself in the Word & serving the Lord in whatever way you can. Look at women as those of your own family. Whenever the wrong thoughts enter, cover it with the Word, look to the Lord to give you a way of escape ( 1 Corinthians 10:13), fill your mind with goodness ( Philippians 4:8). "An idle mind is the Devil's Workshop" - keep your mind employed.
You say that the "void" in your life is huge & that is so dangerous. I can't change your family's use of their spare time, but I can offer some suggestions. And I agree, that Bible reading & prayer cannot take up all your time, even for the ability to concentrate. But remember, prayer to God for help, is not confined at a particular time of the day, but wherever you might be: on the street, in a cafe, out with friends. Whenever sin comes knocking at the door of your heart, your first call is to the Lord Who loves you & wants to see you living in victory.
An addiction, any addiction, requires determination & discipline to rid the habit. The craving might be there for a while, but the pursuit of it has to stop quickly. Firstly, stay away from those areas that are tempting you to lust. Remember that the Bible often speaks of fleeing lust when it comes ( 2 Timothy 2:22, James 4:7, 1 Corinthians 10:13,14, 1 Timothy 6:9-12, 1 Corinthians 6:18-20). If it's books, the Web, the beach, the movies, etc. that is causing you to falter, then stay away from them. The next important thing is how you view women. Always make it a constant practise to see them in a proper, natural way as equal members of society, worthy of real love & respect. You're in that 'highly charged' age group, but that doesn't mean that women should be considered in any other way than you would expect them to consider you or treat you. Be involved in Church youth socializing with them, be careful who your friends are & where you go with them. What are your interests?
When the mind wanders, it sometimes settles on thoughts that are not right or pleasing to the Lord. As you train yourself to focus on other worthy things in life & keep yourself busy, you'll find that your attitude & perceptions of others will also change. When once you looked at women with lust, you will now consider them differently in a godly way, & not as objects bringing on wrong thoughts. And when the time comes for you to settle down in marriage, as you ask the Lord for the right person to be your wife, you will see her & appreciate her for who she is & her contribution to your life & not just for sexual satisfaction. And she will appreciate a husband who has kept himself pure in mind & body, trusting the Lord for everything. You have a great life in Christ ahead of you - continue to seek Him first in everything you face & all your needs will be met, as a loving Father giving care to His son.
I'm retired now & don't get about as much as I used to. However, this gives me opportunity to read more of God's Word (as you are also doing), ministering to others & getting on this KJB Site to be part of a great bunch of believers seeking to help others get to know the Lord & His Word better. Otherwise, odd jobs around the house, gardening & my love for flying (on a computer Simulator of course), also keeps me mentally & spiritually engaged. I too falter & fail the Lord at times - but the Lord's response is never one of anger & rejection, but of love, forgiveness & restoration. Stay close to Him at all times, my young friend - He's always there for you.
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