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I have a question regarding fornication. My wife an I have both been saved sense a young age. We've been married 16 years an about a year ago we made a horrible mistake an decide to go after our own lust an invite another woman into our bed. Sense then we have both realized our faults an have turned away from that but I still struggle with lusting for that even tho I hate there very sin I committed. My question is if I hate this sin an want the lust an thoughts to be gone from my mind why do I still struggle with it so much? I've stayed in prayer asking God for forgiveness an to help me to not want the very things I hate but nothing seems to change. What am I doing wrong? has anyone else ever experienced something like this?
Lastly, have a serious look at your relationship with your wife. Any entertaining of a thought or act that lessens the worth & love in a holy marriage, usually means that the spouse no longer upholds the purity & special bond that it demands. In such a relationship, no third person, whether in body or mind, should ever have any place. Put the Lord & your wife in first & second place & none other. If my mind begins to stray, I also immediately look at my wedding ring on my finger & remember the holy union that the Lord has brought us into & the love & life that we have shared these past 25 years. Engage your mind in this worthy discipline - put away anything that takes you away from the Lord Who loves you & from your wife who cherishes your love & commitment to her. No other person can replace the ones you have in your life now. May the Lord help you & your wife in this area and find His Peace & His Joy in living for Him & each other.
I wanted to thank everyone for the response to my post. I will definitely be taking your advice and putting it to work. I'm thankful that God has sent me brothers that can help me threw this an I look forward to meeting each of you one day.
Hi Levi, another small tip in the power of God is to take the blame wholly upon ourselves when we error. Often our errors involve other people too, but it does not matter. This is particularly true for husbands. Stay courageous. God bless your life and your witness as time continues.
Hello Levi. Just to add to the other brothers' valuable comments. There is usually some area or areas in each one of us that gives Satan access into our lives. It may not be as dramatic as what you've shared - it could even be a fleeting evil thought or intent. Most believers will quickly recognize that intrusion is certainly not of God & something that is either sin or will lead to it. And we have to deal with it - it can be an ongoing daily battle for some - others may find healing as they submit totally to the Spirit's Power & Direction. I'm sure the Lord has forgiven you (& your wife) as you've come before Him in repentance & in earnest to turn away from such sin, yet the sin of lust in your thoughts continue.
The main thing at this point is to prevent those thoughts from becoming an act of sin. You are showing restraint & you must continue to withstand Satan from taking a foothold in your life as he did before. I think of the Apostle Paul writing in Philippians 4:6-9 about those who were plagued with worry & anxiousness (which, by the way, is also sin). Paul suggested that they commit those matters to the Lord in prayer & thanksgiving, allowing God's Peace to fill them & sustain their troubled hearts & minds. Sin takes root in the mind: it's the Devil's playground. We are not to join him in his games, but attend to the Lord's ministry to cleanse & heal our minds. One way that Paul gives, is in verse 8: let the Devil play his games, but you have to perform it the Lord's Way. We must fill our minds with the things that come from the Lord: things of purity, honesty, truth, loveliness, etc. If it's lust, then we turn our minds to the purity & loveliness of God, of our marriage, how to please our wives, engaging ourselves on worthier, wholesome matters. We also attend to the reading of God's Word, especially at those times of fleshly weakness. When such things become a part of our lives, even during temptation, Satan will flee & the Peace of God rules.
To answer your question, "has anyone else ever experienced something like this?" Sometimes I do things I regret, But not to that degree. Being saved 15 years I would have to examine myself closely against the word of God and make my salvation "SURE" IF you haven't already done this.
Let me give you a scenario of what often happens, " NOT TO SAY THIS IS YOUR CASE"
Often people make a profession whether in or out of Church and the next step is they're baptized, The preacher welcomes you in the family of believers and then the celebration.
Your confidence is in an outwardly ceremony. But the Life Jesus gives is inward!! God cleanse the inside of the cup that way the outside may be clean also.
We believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and our confidence is in him being true and faithful.
Our walk will reveal what Spirit is behind us,
Please take a close look at those 15 years in the light of scripture and be sure. You can't change what has already happened but you can be sure.
That's good that you are aware of the struggle between good and evil. Awareness is nearly half the battle. Becoming a Christian doesn't lessen the temptation of sin, in my opinion. But when we know the consequences of sin and do it anyway, it's basically like spitting in Jesus's face and turning our back on Him. He died for us and if we sin we are highly disrespecting Him and putting ourself at risk.
Paul struggled with his flesh too. This doesn't mean a Christian indulges in sin, but it means sin is always a temptation and we need to work hard to avoid it.
Romans 7:19
Jesus said if we love Him we'll obey (and not sin):
John 14:15
One could presume that if we willingly commit sins anyway that we love sin more than Jesus.
HEBREWS 10:26 - this verse echos that.
Matthew 5:30 - makes it clear what the priorities are. Basically if you're tempted to sin, DO ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING IMAGINEABLE TO AVOID IT! EVEN CUTTING OFF YOUR OWN HAND!!! This shows the severity of the consequences of sin. For those genuinely following Christ we are fortunate to have grace for our misteps. However, if we willingly choose to defy Jesus and disobey and sin, we're basically turning our back on Jesus and following the devil. So, I think deliberate sinning, despite being a Christian and knowing better, and knowing right from wrong can have eternal consequences just as Heb 10:26 says.
So, if avoiding this temptation was important enough to you, you could use a lot of strategies to ensure you never commit this horrific sin:
1. Move away (physically remove the temptation out of your life)
2. Don't watch images or videos associated with that desire. Out of sight out of mind.
3. Replace that lust with something positive.
4. Reward yourself for each week you complete where you keep pure thoughts. Save up for a vacation with your wife or something special to reinforce the bond between you.
5. Get rid of all friends and influences that might give temptation.
Lastly, have a serious look at your relationship with your wife. Any entertaining of a thought or act that lessens the worth & love in a holy marriage, usually means that the spouse no longer upholds the purity & special bond that it demands. In such a relationship, no third person, whether in body or mind, should ever have any place. Put the Lord & your wife in first & second place & none other. If my mind begins to stray, I also immediately look at my wedding ring on my finger & remember the holy union that the Lord has brought us into & the love & life that we have shared these past 25 years. Engage your mind in this worthy discipline - put away anything that takes you away from the Lord Who loves you & from your wife who cherishes your love & commitment to her. No other person can replace the ones you have in your life now. May the Lord help you & your wife in this area and find His Peace & His Joy in living for Him & each other.
Stay strong, Don't look back and move forward.
Stay in touch.
GOD BLESS
Hello Levi. Just to add to the other brothers' valuable comments. There is usually some area or areas in each one of us that gives Satan access into our lives. It may not be as dramatic as what you've shared - it could even be a fleeting evil thought or intent. Most believers will quickly recognize that intrusion is certainly not of God & something that is either sin or will lead to it. And we have to deal with it - it can be an ongoing daily battle for some - others may find healing as they submit totally to the Spirit's Power & Direction. I'm sure the Lord has forgiven you (& your wife) as you've come before Him in repentance & in earnest to turn away from such sin, yet the sin of lust in your thoughts continue.
The main thing at this point is to prevent those thoughts from becoming an act of sin. You are showing restraint & you must continue to withstand Satan from taking a foothold in your life as he did before. I think of the Apostle Paul writing in Philippians 4:6-9 about those who were plagued with worry & anxiousness (which, by the way, is also sin). Paul suggested that they commit those matters to the Lord in prayer & thanksgiving, allowing God's Peace to fill them & sustain their troubled hearts & minds. Sin takes root in the mind: it's the Devil's playground. We are not to join him in his games, but attend to the Lord's ministry to cleanse & heal our minds. One way that Paul gives, is in verse 8: let the Devil play his games, but you have to perform it the Lord's Way. We must fill our minds with the things that come from the Lord: things of purity, honesty, truth, loveliness, etc. If it's lust, then we turn our minds to the purity & loveliness of God, of our marriage, how to please our wives, engaging ourselves on worthier, wholesome matters. We also attend to the reading of God's Word, especially at those times of fleshly weakness. When such things become a part of our lives, even during temptation, Satan will flee & the Peace of God rules.
To answer your question, "has anyone else ever experienced something like this?" Sometimes I do things I regret, But not to that degree. Being saved 15 years I would have to examine myself closely against the word of God and make my salvation "SURE" IF you haven't already done this.
Let me give you a scenario of what often happens, " NOT TO SAY THIS IS YOUR CASE"
Often people make a profession whether in or out of Church and the next step is they're baptized, The preacher welcomes you in the family of believers and then the celebration.
Your confidence is in an outwardly ceremony. But the Life Jesus gives is inward!! God cleanse the inside of the cup that way the outside may be clean also.
We believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and our confidence is in him being true and faithful.
Our walk will reveal what Spirit is behind us,
Please take a close look at those 15 years in the light of scripture and be sure. You can't change what has already happened but you can be sure.
God bless
That's good that you are aware of the struggle between good and evil. Awareness is nearly half the battle. Becoming a Christian doesn't lessen the temptation of sin, in my opinion. But when we know the consequences of sin and do it anyway, it's basically like spitting in Jesus's face and turning our back on Him. He died for us and if we sin we are highly disrespecting Him and putting ourself at risk.
Paul struggled with his flesh too. This doesn't mean a Christian indulges in sin, but it means sin is always a temptation and we need to work hard to avoid it.
Romans 7:19
Jesus said if we love Him we'll obey (and not sin):
John 14:15
One could presume that if we willingly commit sins anyway that we love sin more than Jesus.
HEBREWS 10:26 - this verse echos that.
Matthew 5:30 - makes it clear what the priorities are. Basically if you're tempted to sin, DO ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING IMAGINEABLE TO AVOID IT! EVEN CUTTING OFF YOUR OWN HAND!!! This shows the severity of the consequences of sin. For those genuinely following Christ we are fortunate to have grace for our misteps. However, if we willingly choose to defy Jesus and disobey and sin, we're basically turning our back on Jesus and following the devil. So, I think deliberate sinning, despite being a Christian and knowing better, and knowing right from wrong can have eternal consequences just as Heb 10:26 says.
So, if avoiding this temptation was important enough to you, you could use a lot of strategies to ensure you never commit this horrific sin:
1. Move away (physically remove the temptation out of your life)
2. Don't watch images or videos associated with that desire. Out of sight out of mind.
3. Replace that lust with something positive.
4. Reward yourself for each week you complete where you keep pure thoughts. Save up for a vacation with your wife or something special to reinforce the bond between you.
5. Get rid of all friends and influences that might give temptation.
Etc. God bless...
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